All About Work

My mind and heart practically stopped functioning just before 2pm. I wonder how i've survived for the rest of the day. I was like a walking corpse - thinking & actions inconsistent with one another.

Once again (which is the nth time for the month) i am contemplated to quit. THe feeling to quit is getting more and more intense.

Am i really being paranoid, childish and oversensitive here or there's really somthing wrong with keith?

I dunno why but i hate it when he stands at the counter. He will find something to say and being a chicken, i only dare to stare at his meaty paws instead of looking straight into his eyes when talking. Speaking to him can shorten my lifespan by 10 years! oh make it 20 Especially today!

Whats wrong with me off-ing on wednesdays? And do i have tell you what i do during my off days? Do you want to give you a report?! I am already trying to compromise you.

How i wish i can grab those glasses sitting on his nose and throws them across the salon, yell at him in the face:" So what if you are Gemini! So what if you are the salon director! I've had enough of your attitude, you MCP!"

I am really very upset! Now i cant be bf's sister. Cant attend her wedding. It was the malaysia trip then and now this! I hate keith! He's always thwarting my plan! I am just a part timer, can't i even choose my off day?!

About the new Girl

Grace is fun to hang around with. But sometimes i really cant stand her calling me names and hitting me. She's like more mature than i am but can be really childish at times. Occasionally, she seems to have forgotten that SHE is the new recep while i am more senior than her. I hate her bossing me around and calling me names that really hurt me. I hate being bullied Yet I cant do anything for myself. I am a weakling!!

I think i've betrayed Jeric but its to late to feel remorseful. What's done is done...

My whole body is aching and my throat is painful... a signal that i am falling ill...

After working for 12 days straight, i am off today. If its not for the eCr exercise, i supposed i will continue to work until next wed.

Went to ang mo kio hub with sandy. Both of us wanted to buy shoes/sandals. I urgently need to buy sandals cos perhaps i have not wear shoes for months so i am not used to them, wearing them make my feet and toes hurt like hell. haha. I saw 2 pairs which i like at cwp but i decide i will take a look at amk hub in case of regrets. I realised that by asking sandy to go with me is
-_-" cos she went to the ntuc income to sign an insurance and guess how long it took? 1 hr plus! i almost dozed off and the agent was really paiseh about it. haha

So we shopped the building going up and down many times but we din find anything we want. We had some Anderson ice cream. Super pissed off with the people working there. They dont have any smiles and were serving half heartedly. I almost wanted to tell them off but sandy stopped me.

Then we went to Spectacle Hut. I needed contact lenses (the 2nd thing i need in my list) cos mine has run out! And sandy's contact lense in her right eye is causing her some problem. (haha looks like today both of us have converged goals) Sandy asked the lady if she sells lenses in pairs instead of per box. Which gives me an idea that maybe i should buy in pairs too since i am too broke to buy in boxes. ok anyway the lady was very kind and helpful in helping sandy with her lens (a total opposite to the Anderson's service!) And she oso help to test my eyes and adjusted my specs for me. I am impressed with her kindness so i told her that you are very friendly. She seemed paiseh and said its normal. haha. well she should see the anderson's attitude.
So i decided i will buy my lenses from her from now on. I told her that i will come back to buy in boxes when i get my paychecks end of the month.

So my next paychecks go to:
1. portable dvd player
2. contact lenses
3. settle bills

Oya i almost forgot! Couldnt find any shoes there so i went back to cwp and bought the 2 pairs which i saw earlier in the day. Lucky they got 30% off so each pair cost less than $25 and they originally cost $32.90 & $34.90!

Since i am off today, xiangli took over me. We've been texting each other since just now and i already knew that sth will definitely happen today de. but xiangli kept denying until finally she told me that sth sad did happen and she will call me later on.

SO what does this means? This means that problem doesnt lies in me cos xiangli is experiencing the same as me. She oso feels like quitting! Something is wrong with reds lo!! Will update what happened to her..

To be cont...

17/06/2008

Dear Daniel,

Bf is really agitated today.

Bf: Can you not be so scared of people? U're not a child anymore! U need to be stronger gf! How r u gona survive like this? U knw u kp behavin llike meek and scared of everything, ppl is not gona think its cute ok!

My first reaction was huh what happened? I was stunned but at the same time find it a bit funny. I admit i am a coward at work but i never thought that people will think its cute. haha. Anyway heres how i replied her

Me: Ya i know i no guts ma. i cant survive in tis society.
( I really cant survive cos i am vulnerable and get really upset over tiny matters)

Bf: Gf! pls stop saying this kind of things. You can show ppl that you don like face wat. you cant be so meek and weak anymore gf! at least dont show that you are scared. u make ppl wan to bully you.

Looking through bf's texts, i am really in a lost. i am really a weakling.
Cos earlier in the day Grace oso said that ppl see my face wan to bully me. Haiz but i am born with this face..

i replied bf that no matter what happened she mustnt abandon me.

At reds, only bf, huifen and laogong really care about me. Keith is bias and he only likes pretty gals. humph!

And i am like stucked between keith and michelle! Both dont quite agree with each other's management and i seem to become the scapegoat! Ever since i came back to work, a lot of suay things keep happening to me!! I apologised to keith that i know my performance has not been good this time. I appreciate he understands cos he said he knows that perhaps i am stressed out cos of school and exam. But i don like it when he said "but must wake up la". Tho he seems to 体谅me, but he oso sounds sarcastic. i hate him!

I cant stand my sis! keep stealing my clothes!

Ping, i miss Odasan!!
Ping, are you bored that my blog is all abt complainig my work? haha

Dear Daniel,

I am posted to central today. Michelle din talk alot to me - less than 10 sentences ba i guess. I never be close to her like siping and hazel. But I prefer it this way cos i dont wan to be too intimate with her. She can be quite bitchy. I would prefer to work under male supervisor/director.

Eijisan was there. And theres oso a new Jap stylist - Odasan. He leaves a good impression cos when i went to the pantry to punch card, he actually stop his conversation with another person, stands up and intiate to shake hand with me and self intro himself. I was like wow. Hes polite! At that very moment, i decided hm i like him. keke. THroughout the day, hes really polite but he din talk much cos hes not good in english. And hes c-u-t-e! haha.
Unfortunately, hes leaving for japan on tuesday but i am not working at central tomorrow!! Shucks! So today is the first and last day i see him le!! huh~~~ Eijisan is very nice to me too! He kept patting my head and he gave me chocolates, my fav! I really 舍不得 them so i asked yoheisan to teach me how to say "i will miss you" in jap (its not that they don understand eng, but i jus wan to say it in jap haha) So learnt how to say sabishiiyo~ mata kitene. Actually i meant to say it to Odasan but i dont want to make him think that i am so straightforward so i just say to Eijisan. Guess what Eijisan say? He said me kawaii!! keke. And he asked me if i know whats kawaii. of cos i know! Then he tried to say 你很可爱。And he gave me a Jap bread. haha.

Ping i want to marry a japanese le!! I think if Odasan continues to stay in spore and i continue to work at central, i will fall in love with him. hahaha.

When everybody is gone, which left only me, kenneth and Jim in the salon, i asked Jim to wash my hair for me. Then a customer came, Jim had to attend to him, and i have to leave my hair damp. Suddenly Jackie came back and he offered to blow my hair. When Jim was done with the customer he joined in the task in blowing my hair.

Ta-dah! The job is done! ^^

I am so happy today!
But i fall sick le. Running nose and kept sneezing non-stop. Urgh!

Somebody must be cursing me..

Just now Jackie asked me 我们(bugis + central)比较疼你还是他们(ps)比较疼你.
Because i felt委屈for the past few days at ps and he asked me this qns means that they really dote on me(if not wont compare, rite) so i said they.
But honestly speaking, if i am not pessimistic, actually ps colleagues also treat me very nice. haha i am really 身在福中不知福吧。
But i am really jealous that keith seems to like Grace more than me! keke
I am emotional. I let my feelings rule me. hee

I miss Odasan le!!

I am very sure that i have lost all interest and passion working at reds. I have had enough of most of the people there (some are really nice tho =>) Practically everyday i have to drag myself to work. The enthusiasiam going to work is gone. I've sort out my thoughts. Regardless of which branch i go, the result will still be the same. I am too naive to think that going to bugis will make life much easier than at ps. Working the same old job for 3 yeaRS is really too long..

So, i am lookin for jobs now. Office jobs this time. I am tired of the long working and standing hours, politics and looking at some peoples' sullen face. I might regret quiting next time, but i will worry about it in future. Perhaps this is a good time to quit, when i am still "风光" haha. I want them to regret "losing" me. keke

I have been harping on wanting to quit for quite some time le. But i still have to consider about my school fees and living expenses. so i will quit if i can find a job before end of june and the pay is $7 per hour. I cannot be impulse cos i dont wish to end up like my cousin.

亲爱的丹尼尔：

我想我可以投选十大最爱哭奖。

竟然可以在5天里哭了两次。 这次重回工作岗位我很不开心。

我到底是怎么了？我好像在退化了。

今天我忘了跟顾客收＄188.10。把我吓得半死因为不知道keith的反应会是什么。

还好他并没有生我的气，只是觉得为什么这次我回来好像有问题。这点我比谁都更清楚。我何尝不是也觉得我好像一直在犯错。。
虽然这次keith不生我的气，我还是无法原谅我自己。这像是作了3 年recep该犯的错吗？真的是恨死我自己了。。。
老公说她觉得我会这样是因为我心里一直想着要去bugis所以在ps才无法专心。
我的的确确应该调整我的心情了。以目前的情况来看，短期内我是不可能去别间的了。

好！我决定重拾心情，认真地在ps做, I cant afford to make another mistake!

从这件事看来，我觉得我未来只有两个选择适合我：家庭主妇或自己当老板。很惭愧，但我觉得我真得很不适合作工。。。

明天起将会是另一个秀芬去上班了！！

说点轻松的事吧！
月底领了薪水后：
1。 settle all bills
2。 portable DVD player
3。 indulge in a good meal - chocolate cake!
4。 spree!

Dear Daniel,
I am so tired!

累，累，累！

Haven been updating blog & online for the past few days. Ever since i started working, i never have a time of my own. I wake up at 730 reach home at 11pm. What kind of job is this?!

5/6/08 THurs
I was really looking forward to work. Chirpy & laughing at anything. Until some things happen which likd of upset me (i can't rmb what) so it spoiled my mood for the whole day. And i was secretly wishing that i could be transfered back to bugis... During closing, i really no mood le. Keith seemed to notice it so he started to joke around with me perhaps to make me feel better.

6/6/08 Fri
I made quite a number of mistakes at work: spilled coke, forget to prepare the performance sheet & assistants point form etc.. So i started to blame myself for being do stupid. Altho i know i made these blunders cos i haven been working for months suddenly i cant switch from studying mode to working mode. I am still not used to working. BUT i still cant forgive myself. No excuse for my poor performance at work. I am quite a perfectionist when working cos i want everyone to be happy and satisfied with my performance. I want to be liked and doted! But i can sensed that keith was happy with me today. He din even looked at me when i said bye to him. Once again, i feel very upset. I am not looking forward to working on saturday le. I was messaging with laogong the whole night that i want to work at bugis, begging her to change with me, that i dont want to work with xiangli cos not close with her, telling her i will call michelle to ask her to transfer me to pbj...

7/6/08 Sat
My mood really down to the bottom le. Then because i haven work for a long time, i really got no pocket money. so i ask my sis if she can lend me $2 but she said she oso no money le so i turn to my bro but he doesnt want to lend me (never seen anyone as stingy as him le lo!)! This spoils my mood further so i just broke down. I really had enough! Not happy working ang have such selfish bro. My sis kind of pity me so she said she can lend me $2 but i rejected. i really cried my tears out. Crying and crying and crying all the way to mrt. When i couldnt reach bf, i Called bf to pour my sorrows and she doesnt know what to do haha. so i was like laughing and crying at the same time and i really dread to go to work tat very day!! Even tot of calling jeric! No mood to go to keith's bday party at ni9ht le. reached home at 130am. Keith's bday was fun, at partyworld a couple of songs, had some cakes... i feel so happy when my colleagues said my singing is nice. keke. They said it was not "me". Took a lot of pictures and keith was so crazy very unlike the keith at work!haha. at least this is some thing which makes me feel happier.

8/6/08 Sun
which is today!! What can i say? today is the most happiest day for me! Why? Cos keith is off today! I feel so much relaxed and happier. Can also do things smoothly lo...compared to normal days, so tensed up and stressed.. very happy!! But i am very pissed off by jack! forget it. don talk about him makes me mad.

laogong and bf are my closest colleagues le! Cant imagine life at work without them... One is older than me by one year and the other 3 years. But what their thinking is mature and what they say always enlighten me. I hate politics, backstabbing, badmouthing people! I asked bf why chitchatting with friends is never a gossiping act but with colleagues is gossiping leh? She said cos we have nothing in common with colleagues so can only gossip so that theres something to chat. I thikn this is so true lo... And i always mind and pessimistic thinking could that person dislike me? laogong said we shouldnt waste our feelings and feel sad. we shouldnt be affected by them. Instead, we can direct out feelings and feel happy to those who like us. Then laogong say. in big rabbit's heart, i am the first. she oso told me Jim once told her i come first too (which really surprised me). And she believes that jeric dotes on me more than any other receps. Then i realised that why am i always be bothered with who doesnt like me butv i never tot of those who really treats me very good. She told me that because xiangli is only 17 yrs old thats why people dote on her whereas i mam 21 years old already so people will try to treat me like normal colleagues. which i why i hate to grow up! haha. anyway i really straightened my thoughts so i will try to stay happy everyday, tho i still wish to be working at bugis..

ps: laogong-xinyang; bf-hazel

Dear Daniel,

Finally the battle is over!

Just now i went to Citispa @ yishun and enjoyed 2 treatments. After that i went to thread my upper lips.

The above is what's initially planned for today But then again, considering the already burnt hole in my pocket... forget it...

Usually after exams, common activities are, shopping in town, hanging out with friends... definitely not cooped up at home. Unfortunately for me, not working for months have the shopping freak in me being imprisoned. There is no kick at all if it's just window shopping! Don't even think about it when you are broke! Someone should come up with something like buying clothes with clothes. Yup, not with money. THat will really help us save a lot of money!

Straight after exam, I went to big rabbit's place to have my hair coloured and trimed. Wah I really missed having my hair styled! keke. i think i ate almost 10 rochers. While waiting for the colour to process, i surfed the internet and stayed for awhile after the whole thing was done since i really have nothing to do at all! Luckily Big rabbit is understanding, knowing that i am poor at the moment so he din charge me at all. hee. And he bought me a cute keychain from Japan. That's really sweet. =) And i immediately hang it on my handphone.

When i was frantically looking for someone to have dinner with this evening, ping's text came and said she was at sun plaza. (a perfect timing!) Haa, a stroke of good luck! I was just thinking i am so pathetic that i can't even find a friend to have dinner with. Thanks ping! ^^ I haven eat and talk so much for a long time le! haha

Looks like it's not only me who have nothing to do after exam. I'll see sharon, jeremy whenever i am online haha. And they too have nth to do.

I shall stop here. Goodnite Daniel! ^^

Dear Daniel,

so many things are happening all at one time. I almost can't take it. It's not about me but people around me - from family member to friend and to colleague - people who are close to me.

I understand that there is a phase in our life when we will be rebellious, i had personally gone through that stage so i know. But i dunno why my sis is turning from bad to worst! I feel that one contributing factor is she is entangled in a boy-gal relationship. Even if she doesn't breathe a word to any of us, i can guess that this relationship is not going well. And even if she doesn't admit, when things go wrong between them or her friends, she just throws temper, show attitudes at home. Obviously her EQ is low. They are simply too young to handle relationship. Now i know the worries of parents who forbid their young children to be involved in a relationship.
Alright, why do i say that she is getting from bad to worse. Here goes: she actually sneaked off without informing mum; she can argue back as if she has done nothing wrong; she simply tells someone off over nothing, ridiculously!; she goes out on no-school day; apply for Nets card and swipe even after warnings; rude, unrespectful...well the list just goes on.
I hope she will do some reflection and i seriously hope this is only a part of her growing up. Frankly speaking, i do not have any good impression about AhLians. And if my sis turns into one, i swear i won't hesitate to put her to girls' home even if it risks her hating me. As the saying goes, Thats only for her own good.

THis morning, i received a message from angie telling me that her grandma has passed on. And the next minute, hazel tells me that she is pregnant and getting married the month and i am asked to be her bridesmaid.
Life has so much 未知数. Isn't it so ironic?
Anyway with exams and sad things happening, this is something to be happy about and really lifts my mood!
I am really very happy for hazel and i feel that i am even more excited than her! Just now i was talking to her on the phone, shooting her with questions and questions, about her baby, her wedding on that day blah blah blah. Wedding really needs a good planning but i realised that she din have an idea whats going to happen on that day. So i told her that she really needs to start planning. Maybe cos the baby that came caught them off balance ba. haha well at least they handle the matter maturely. The thought of aborting the baby did occur but afterall the baby is innocent!! haha. =) Hazel joked about her bro and me again. But i know instinctively that nothing extraordinary will happen cos 感觉是要对位的， 不是吗？Tho we haven met before...
My schoolmate just asked me when i am getting married but i replied that i dont dare to think about it. This is one issue that really scares me and i think the only way to get over it is for me to get married le ba? haha
This is my second time to be asked to be the bridesmaid from yet another colleague. i wonder when it will be for my friends?
Dear daniel, i guess I shall end my entry here. Goodnite! =)

This is my blog!
If u want to spam click here .
No ripping
No spamming


:D


Name:Silver
Single
DOB:11.2.1987
Don't mess with Aqua gals!




Friend gatherings! Chit chatting online/ on the phone, Online Shopping. Clothes, clothes & more clothes! Singing! Favorite comfort food on the road is CHOCOLATE!!!
wish: A prince charming :) .

Cakes!.
2nd upper class honors .
Money!.


x December 2007
x January 2008
x February 2008
x March 2008
x April 2008
x May 2008
x June 2008
x July 2008
x August 2008
x September 2008
x October 2008
x November 2008
x December 2008
x January 2009
x February 2009
x March 2009
x April 2009
x November 2009


Blueberryun
Beloved Angie
BabyNana
BlurSharon
EmoBelle
Whimsical lasses

-










Do not remove credits !

Designer : -BELLEBELLE-